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Time for a Resolution

Posted in: Blog by admin on December 27, 2010

It’s that time of year.  The end of the year.  The period in which the word “resolution” pops up all around us.  It is a reminder.  It is a time to set goals.  It is an awakening.  Often, it takes a date on the calendar, such as this, to give us the strength and motivation for change.  And, that’s okay.  However we get there …. as long as we arrive.

I actually don’t make New Year’s resolutions.  I never have.  But, it’s not that I don’t think it’s a good idea.  I have just always been a more impulsive, in-the-now person who gets an idea in her head and wants to act instantly upon it.  So, if I want to start going to the gym, for example, I’m not going to tell myself that I’ll start going in 2011, I’ll pack my bag and head there later today.  And, even as I write this, I believe it to be true.  But, in reality, I’m stuck, as well.  For it’s not the daily, habitual routines that I want to change in 2011, it is the greater patterns in my life.  It is my path.  It is my future.  It is my now.  I want to be more present.  I want to complain less.  I want to challenge myself to evolve and improve and grow.  Sure, I also want to eat healthier and eventually cut all meat out of my diet, but it is my state-of-mind and my attitude about which I’m most concerned.

I was reminded of a favorite philosophy of mine yesterday afternoon as I had a conversation with my brother Brian.  He said, “I always remember what you told me: You said, you can either change a situation or accept it.”  I instantly replied, “That’s right.  All else is madness.”  I read that years ago when my cousin Mitch insisted that I read “The Power of Now.”  The book sits by my bed like a bible still, and I continually re-read compelling lines such as these.  But, even more influential than flipping through the pages and seeing my underlined sentences was having Brian look at me and remind me of something that I so often preach.  It was just part of our conversation about life, but there was something powerful about the cycle of the words … hearing a statement that I have highlighted and discussed and pondered come out of Brian’s mouth moved me in a way that surprised me.

Everything started to rush at me: my relationships, my desire to get back to work, my children, my life — the thoughts that swirl around my head and even cause me to “complain” from time to time.  But, what is complaining?  It is a non-acceptance of the now.  It is part of being stuck.  And, just like that, I realized that I am stuck, that I am not simply changing the situation or leaving the situation, I am indeed in that state of madness!

I  needed to hear my words spoken back at me to awaken me to all that I know is true.  It was such a simple moment, surrounded by children running around us full of laughter.    But, it was in that space that I knew it was time.  It is time.  It is time to make a resolution.  And, I won’t wait the four additional days to do so as the New Year approaches.  I will make it now:  If there is a situation in which I’m dissatisfied or unhappy, I will either get out or I will accept it.  That’s it.  Change or acceptance.  Leave or be.  For it is true, there is no grey area.  And, if there is, it is sprinkled with so much lunacy that is impossible to swallow.

This philosophy applies to everything we do, everything we think, everything about which we complain.  If you hate the winters in Chicago and find yourself whining about the ice and wind, then either move or accept that this is where you live.  What about your work?  If you are not challenged or are simply unhappy, then leave.  Or accept it as you sign your bi-weekly paycheck.  You might say it’s not so easy.  There is so much that we cannot change.  There are so many factors to consider.  Of course, that is true.  That is why we can then focus on acceptance.

Climb up to the next rung and think about your romantic relationship.  If you are not experiencing that balance and passion that you desire, then get out or accept that you love this person for many other reasons that you will celebrate.  It’s simple. It’s complicated.  It’s both.  And, it is the truth.  It is how we should live.  We have so many choices.  We are often just afraid to make them.  Breathe deeply and look ahead.  All of the hope and possibility and beauty … it’s right there before us.

So, in a fashion that is unlike myself, I raise my glass of champagne to you and passionately resolve that I will change or accept all that is laid out before me in 2011, all that is before me right now.  And, with that, I wish you all a New Year full of love and peace and joy and dancing and laughter.  Complaints, don’t even try to crash our party.

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3 Responses to “Time for a Resolution”

  1. Sue love says:

    Love this one!! U go girl. Love u!!

  2. rachel switall says:

    Great post Amy. Happy New Year to you! : )

  3. brian says:

    Sometimes it takes a baby brother to put you back on track! Great post, Sis.

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